Why Do Narcissists Get Jealous? (What Triggers their Jealousy?)
Why Do Narcissists Get Jealous? Jealousy is one of the prominent emotional responses you can expect from a narcissist when you have everything sorted and they are still struggling, or when things do not work out for them but the situation favors you and not them, when you achieve more than them, or when you get attention and not them.
What would trigger a narcissist and how would that make them jealous? A narcissist is someone who needs attention, praise, boost, and appreciation all the time. They want to be the center of attraction or the elephant in the room. So when that does not happen, a narcissist is jealous.
Narcissists often tend to be competitive in many dimensions of life, and so they always need to be most prominent in whatever they do or put their hands on. They also have boosted self-confidence but do lack self-esteem as they mask their real self-respect, emotions, and personality behind the mask of perfectionist that they manifest to be.
Narcissists often lead a life under the influence of hypocrisy, which makes them double-faced. They often mirror the selves that people want to see and also live with their real selves behind that mirrored image. So when they are unable to prove themselves or bruise their self-ego, they either deflect or face a wave of uncalled emotions which include incompetence, jealousy, hatred, and abhor themselves.
Narcissists would often present their image as desired by you, they would mention all those traits that are liked by you, and they would make their image so spotless and desirable that you would be deceived by their charming fake personalities. They would often lie to you about their real selves. They would always wear a fake mirrored mask to keep you interested in them.
So when they lose what they want which mostly includes attention, praise, control, or any kind of gain, or when someone else receives them; this is when they become highly competitive, jealous mean, and fierce.
They even get jealous of their parents, siblings, romantic partners along with whoever else seems a threat to their egoistic self which believes they are the best. They can be jealous of their co-workers, exes, or anyone who seems happier than them. Jealousy is an emotion that a narcissist develops prominently in their lives; knowingly or unknowingly.
Narcissists feel jealousy is different because they showcase their jealousy by shielding it with rage. They do feel jealousy but would not admit it as that might make them vulnerable. Instead, they try to cover up jealousy in the form of rage, verbal abuse, or even mocking. They might often resort to mocking you when they feel jealous and insecure.
Which situations can make a narcissist jealous?
Narcissists feel jealous in many situations but a few common situations are mentioned below,
- They get jealous when their exes find new romantic partners and seem happy with them.
- They get jealous when a co-worker receives a promotion for doing the same work as a narcissist.
- They even get jealous of their romantic partners when they feel they have their eyes n someone else or are cheating.
- They can be even jealous of their partners for their growth and development in both their personal and professional like.
- They feel jealous when their sibling outperforms them in any phase of life; be it in academics, building a stable career, finding romantic partners, or outperforming them in any manner.
- They even get jealous of their children. For instance, when their children are passing through the youth stage and are beautiful, a narcissistic mother feels jealous of their beauty and fitness.
- When someone else receives praise and attention for the same amount of work done as a narcissist, or for similar reasons then a narcissist definitely gets super jealous.
- When someone tries to steal their spotlight or thunder, then a narcissist gets jealous.
- When someone known to them makes better progress, gains anything better than them, or outperforms them, then narcissists do feel jealousy prominently.
- They can be jealous even of their neighbors, friends, and distant relatives.
- For instance, when a neighbor buys an expensive or highly functioning car, then they feel jealous.
- Or when a friend achieves their goals, or even when a distant relative is doing superior to them in life.
- In short, they can be jealous in any situation, when someone else is happier, more successful, or outwits them and gains attention.
Narcissists can be both jealous and envious of others. Narcissist gets envious when they do not get what they want and someone else achieves it or gets it. But a narcissist can be jealous out of fear when they fear losing what they have. Their defense mechanism forces them to switch over to over-protectiveness of what they have which often turns to jealousy.
Why do Narcissists get Jealous? (What Triggers their Jealousy?)
- The feeling of insecurity makes them jealous
- Their constant need for attention and competitiveness makes them jealous
- Their desire to be perfect and better than everyone else makes them jealous
- Their low self-esteem and deprivation of self-pride make them jealous
- The constant feeling of entitlement makes them feel jealous
- When they are compared to others they can feel jealous
- They can be jealous of someone else’s happiness
1. The feeling of insecurity makes them jealous
Narcissists have insecurities regarding many aspects of their life one of which is maintaining their relationships. Narcissists may have anxiousness when it comes to their partner or the source of supply. When their partner praises someone else’s achievements in front of them it makes them feel insecure and jealous. They might think that their partner may leave them for someone better with a bigger achievement.
For instance, a narcissist might be insecure about their partner flirting or showing interest in someone else when they are not with them. Or when their partner loves someone who is an overachiever, a narcissist might get jealous or even hide their underachievements by lashing at their partners for thinking less of them.
2. Their constant need for attention and competitiveness makes them jealous
The narcissist constantly tries to prove their worth to grab attention. They just need to be perfect at everything and anything they put their mind to. So this leads them to their super competitiveness mode, where they can go to any extent to achieve what they wish. They can be mean, jealous and even malice when it comes to achieving what they want.
Narcissist desires your undivided attention all the time. So when your attention is split between you and someone else or something else they get jealous of that and even angry in that case. They get jealous because they fear that they might lose your attention or in this case lose you too.
3. Their desire to be perfect and better than everyone else makes them jealous
A Narcissistic individual would be jealous of your achievements, your happiness, or even your growth. If you surpass them in any way or by means they will not be happy about it and instead will degrade your achievement with jealous comments or criticism. They might also just twist the reality of the situation.
Narcissists have a tendency to be perfectionists or at least better than everyone else wherever they go. But that is impossible. They try to be noticeable, nosy, and attention-grabbing. But that does not work every time. They get jealous in such situations when someone outfoxes them.
4. Their low self-esteem and deprivation of self-pride make them jealous
Narcissists have an internal inbuilt inferiority complex but they do not allow that to be showcased in any case. They shield it with jealousy and anger.
Narcissists can be dismissed easily, as little things just hurt their pride. They get easily annoyed when you do not act according to them or when you disregard them and their opinions knowingly or unknowingly. If you do not validate them, ignore them, do not seek their advice, dismiss what they say, throw facts straight at their face, prove them incorrect, not give them attention, crush their ego, or do anything that hurts their self-pride and self-esteem. They can be both pissed and jealous in this situation.
5. The constant feeling of entitlement makes them feel jealous
Their need to be grandiose at everything, makes them think that the “world revolves around them”. So when that does not happen they get jealous. Narcissists feel that they deserve everything better and more than others. his feeling is called a feeling of entitlement. So when you achieve, receive, or are entitled to something more than them, they get jealous of you or be a hindrance in your way so that you also do not achieve what they want.
For instance, if a co-worker is entitled to more privileges than them, they would do anything to seize that or try to get those privileges for themselves. They would be so jealous of someone else’s growth and hard work.
6. When they are compared to others they can feel jealous
Narcissists consider themselves to be superior, smarter, important, deserving, and ahead of you, and thus when you compare them with someone else, they feel jealous and might even doubt your intentions.
They might even doubt you and ask whether you are cheating on them. They feel that when you compare them with someone else that degrades their value and that someone else might have caught your attention.
7. They can be jealous of someone else’s happiness
When a narcissist sees someone happier than them then creates a commotion in a narcissist’s life. This includes their parents, siblings, partners, friends or exes, or any past contacts even. If you act all excited or happy around them, especially when a narcissist is feeling low or unhappy, they may be so jealous that they might curse your happiness silently. Narcissists can be mean and malice when it comes to happiness or pleasure.
Should you make a narcissist jealous purposefully?
You might think that making a narcissist jealous can avenge your wrongdoings or at least seek some justice for all the sufferings as narcissists suffer jealousy in an intensified manner. Their prominent reactions include aggression, jealousy, and malice when it comes to anything that has hurt them.
So if you had a narcissistic ex-partner, you decide to get your revenge by showing off your new partner or making them jealous by proving that you are happier with the other person than with them. This makes them all worked up more and less jealous. They might not even react the way you expect them to. They have a very strong game going and you might not be able to beat them with their own tactics as making their partners jealous is one of their most common tactics.
This action may also lead them to seek revenge, or abuse you through blackmail. It would be better not to make a narcissist jealous on purpose as that might cost you your mental peace and a wild stir in your happy easy-going life.
Conclusion
Narcissists often lead a life under the influence of hypocrisy, which makes them double-faced. They often mirror the selves that people want to see and also live with their real selves behind that mirrored image. So when they are unable to prove themselves or bruise their self-ego, they either deflect or face a wave of uncalled emotions which include incompetence, jealousy, hatred, and abhor themselves.
Narcissists would often present their image as desired by you, they would mention all those traits that are liked by you, and they would make their image so spotless and desirable that you would be deceived by their charming fake personalities. They would often lie to you about their real selves. They would always wear a fake mirrored mask to keep you interested in them. So when they lose what they want which mostly includes attention, praise, control, or any kind of gain, or when someone else receives them; this is when they become highly competitive, jealous mean, and fierce.
They even get jealous of their parents, siblings, romantic partners along with whoever else seems a threat to their egoistic self which believes they are the best. They can be jealous of their co-workers, exes, or anyone who seems happier than them. Jealousy is an emotion that a narcissist develops prominently in their lives; knowingly or unknowingly.
When a narcissist sees someone happier than them then creates a commotion in a narcissist’s life.
You might think that making a narcissist jealous can avenge your wrongdoings or at least seek some justice for all the sufferings as narcissists suffer jealousy in an intensified manner. But do not attempt to use jealousy purposefully as that might cost you more than gaining anything.
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