What is the Worst Thing You Can Do to a Narcissist? (New Things Added)

by Ella Carrillo · August 7, 2023

What is the Worst Thing You Can Do to a Narcissist? You might start getting such thoughts when you have had a complete roller coaster relationship with the narcissist; from the honeymoon phase of the connection to the discard phase. This is when they make you feel powerless, and thus this is the time for you to retaliate your power and control.

A relationship or any sort of bond with a narcissist may start to overwhelm you when their toxicity just feels torturous. Everyone has the capacity to tolerate, and everyone loses their cool when they might have to deal with someone manipulative. Forming a romantic relationship with a narcissist may seem the toughest of all relationships, as you get easily replaced by some other person so effortlessly by the narcissist.

If you have dated a narcissist, you might have passed through the series of events that are described below. You felt like you met someone amazing, who seems charming and mesmerizing from the start. You started to fall for their charm. Their affection got you, and their love bombing convinced you that this is the one.

Some time has passed, and you grow apart to become distant eventually, as you come to deal with and know about toxic nature, their manipulation, and the unhealthy relationship that you have been trapped in. Gaslighting, insulting, lying, and emotional abuse are toxic traits that you have been dealing with constantly.

It seems like the person that you fell madly in love with, is no more the same person. everything is changed. Your relationship starts falling apart, and it feels like you have been hurt, destroyed, and scarred emotionally and mentally. It all starts feeling like the other person is eager to get separated or wants to do so by destroying you in bits and pieces gradually.

You start feeling powerless, betrayed, and emotionally damaged. That is how you might feel after getting into a relationship with a person who is affected by narcissism. But this is the time to strike back, and not lose hope. It is going to be a difficult journey, as getting your power back from someone who craves and thrives upon power and control is nearly scary and seems impossible.

But do not get disheartened and do not lose hope. There are a few ways through which you can get back or get even with the narcissist, as here below some tips are mentioned which provide answers to the question, “What is the Worst Thing You Can Do to a Narcissist?” Before diving into the topic, let us get a little more familiar with narcissists and narcissism.

What is a Narcissist?

The common description of a narcissist would be described as someone who is self-absorbed, who loves and seeks constant attention, adoration, and validation, who loves their grandiose image, and who tries to impress others with their charismatic charm.

Narcissists are often characterized by their boosted sense of self-importance, self-pride, and self-needs. With a narcissist, everything is just about them. Narcissists thrive upon the attention, adoration, and validation that they receive from others, and what makes them distinguished from others is the way they think and the way they behave, which is totally selfish and mean.

What is the Worst Thing You Can Do to a Narcissist?

At this point in the article, you might be wondering, how to get even with someone who seems not normal or operated differently on an emotional level. Is it even possible to get even with such a toxic person? But give a rest to your brisk thoughts, as it is really possible to hurt someone that hurt you on so many levels.

If you have made up your mind firmly and wish to get even with the narcissist, then you can hurt a narcissist emotionally, just with a few simple words, some simple methods, and finding a few weaknesses. These are some of the Worst Things You Can Do to a Narcissist.

The words that might hurt a narcissist

It is surely possible to hurt a narcissist, just with a few words of insults or humiliation.

Narcissists constantly have deep-rooted feelings of anxiety, low self-esteem, insecurity, and low confidence in their own self as they are always masking their true selves from people.

So being humiliated and insulted is one of the biggest fears for a narcissist. They feel if they let their guard down they might face a backlash which may ruin their grandiose image. Narcissists and criticism are polar opposites. Thus criticism in the forms of humiliation, insults, or critical comments, may really offend the narcissist.

A few other ways are mentioned below,

Humiliation

You might be making scenarios in your mind and getting scared as to how you would humiliate a narcissist. But it is not as difficult as you think it is. Just gather your courage to empower your self-worth and face the narcissists fearlessly.

Narcissists just look confident and all figured out from their exterior or their outward facade, but deep down they are scared cats who have a weak ego, nil to zero self-worth, and pliability. So anything said in a negative tone or every criticism might make them feel that you have humiliated them.

Public humiliation may act like the biggest and most powerful arrow in the quiver. Their grandiose image may just get shattered at this point.

Challenging their opinions

Narcissists find it outrageous when someone challenges their opinions, especially cerebral narcissists. All narcissists find it difficult to accept flaws in their opinions as they think they are the most intelligent people that someone could ever meet. But cerebral narcissists take things to another level when you mock their opinions.

Attacking their intelligence, mocking their thoughts, and degrading their worth by making them insecure about their opinions is the best way to get back at them or get even with them. It can create tragic and traumatic experiences for such narcissists, and you may be able to hurt them by challenging their opinions.

Criticism

Even though narcissists may seem perfect, they are flawed too. They also have underlying deep-rooted insecurities and have depleting self-worth. They cannot take criticism well and they are also unsure from within, they just try to portray a perfect grandiose image in front of others.

So when you criticize them for their unmatched opinions, they might get so infuriated with the fact that someone is criticizing them and their flawless personalities. They might be enraged when someone criticizes them as they think criticism is a direct attack on their self-belief of being perfect and superior beings.

The actions that might piss off a narcissist

Take away their narcissistic supply

Narcissistic supply is everything that makes a narcissist feel empowered. A narcissistic supply is everything that makes a narcissistic life fulfilled. It is that one thing that a narcissist always craves even if it is in its negative forms, that is attention. One can even say that a narcissist is only able to fulfill their life purposes on the basis of supply itself.

They feel crippled without their sources of admiration, attention, validation, importance, and everything that makes them feel special. Narcissists seek supply more than anything, and they could do everything to obtain their dose of supply.

Narcissistic supply is one of the prime reasons for them to date commit to a relationship. Thus, when a narcissist loses their source of supply, they feel that they no longer can lead a normal life. Even the thought of losing their supply source terrorizes them even though they have backup supply sources.

Ignorance

A narcissist might seem charming, delectable, and inescapable during the initial phases of the relationship or friendship. But as you spend some time with them, you come to know about their true personalities, and that is the moment you feel that you should either confront them or break up with them. But what if there is a mid-way here, where you do not have to face their rage by confronting them and also not face their revenge by breaking up; and that is mid-way is “FEIGNING IGNORANCE“.

Ignoring them would save you so much trauma where you would be safe from them draining you emotionally and mentally and also dealing with them becomes far more easy, when you just start feigning ignorance. Ignoring them would give you your power back, you would be able to do as you wish and also get the control back.

Out compete them

Narcissists have this compulsion to win and excel at everything they do. They have high standards regarding their achievements and thus they love to compete just to prove their self-worth. Thus out-competing them becomes one of the best ways to piss them off.

Narcissists are indulged in comparisons more than often, thus they might be super pissed when they get to know that you outsmarted them in some way.

So after a breakup, a narcissist would check up on you to see how you are doing without them. They would expect you to be gloomy and lost without them, but the moment they find you just fine or even better without their involvement, they might feel uneasy and anxious.

Thus they would find chances to compete and outsmart you or lure you back into the toxic relationship to regain their power over you. But do not get trapped in their toxic relationship cycle once again as they have simply not changed, they are yet the same.

So when you outsmart or out-compete the narcissist, they would get irritated in brainstorming ideas just to outsmart you, and thus this can become one of the efficient ways to put the narcissists in a state of despair.

Finding their weaknesses

One of the worst things you can do to a narcissist is find their weaknesses and use those against them, either to seek revenge or just to give them a taste of their own behavior. All individuals have different weaknesses, but there are a few common weaknesses for narcissistic individuals that may be used against them like,

Being happy without them
Going no-contact to make them feel abandoned
Getting involved with other people
Prioritizing self-care
Being unpredictable

Things NOT to DO with the Narcissists

Appealing to their Empathy

Narcissists do possess empathetic emotions for people in need, who are troubled or hurt, but it is only that they do not choose to display that compassion for others as they feel being vulnerable might hurt their grandiose image, or their mighty unaffected reputation might get tarnished if they display sympathy and empathy for others. They feel that they would be looked upon as someone weak, or they may lose their power over others trying to comfort others with care and understanding.

Thus expecting empathy is the worst thing you can expect from a narcissist.

Making them feel Guilty

Guilt comes through an internal reflection of one’s own actions. When you feel bad for doing something and regret committing something that may hurt others or something that seems unethical and immoral. Guilt can peddle the feelings like regretting and asking for forgiveness and punishment, enticing change in one’s behavior, and making sure to never repeat the mistake or commit such a fault ever again. Guilt brings in repentance and obliges a person to seek forgiveness.

But expecting a self-reflection through guilty from a narcissist is a big NO-NO. They are self-centered and thus they always think about themselves firsthand often their responses are not driven by emotions and concern for others, but are driven by how everything might impact their own self along with maintaining their grandiose self-image; meaning, they might apologize to someone if they feel guilty, but that is not out of a genuine concern for that person’s emotions, rather make them seem more palpable.

Explaining Yourself

When you think you need to explain the narcissist, that is the initiation of the narcissist’s victory over you, and you do not want that. When you explain or put your viewpoint forward regarding some disputable matter, the narcissist would feel that they already won as they would love to hear you suffer through your explanation. Narcissists would always see you in the fault and they’re not accepting the blame even if you explain them, so why make futile efforts?

Should you actually seek revenge on a narcissist?

If seeking revenge with a narcissist would do you any good then do it. But if you love your mental peace and happy life, just leave a narcissist behind and move on.

Also, seeking revenge might lead to a narcissist taking an act of revenge on you, which can be ruinous for you. So think before you take a step further toward seeking revenge

Revenge is not always the answer to all the suffering. Focusing on living a better life is more important than seeking revenge. By doing so you would grow flawlessly and even be the bigger person here.

The most common and appropriate step is to step away or leave the relationship with the narcissistic individual. Once you acknowledge their arrogant nature, their toxic behavior, and your deteriorating mental health, that is the time to decide to step away from them. Secondly, no revenge and focusing all energy on self-care is the best option compared to seeking revenge to cope with all the trauma that was put in your way by a narcissist. Moving on and becoming a better version of yourself can be the best revenge.

The Flash Recap

In conclusion, the best way to maintain peace in your life is by avoiding engagement with narcissistic individuals or engaging somehow with them. Do not get involved in their manipulative games, just get out of the toxic relationship as soon as possible, and never look back at the abusive relationship.

If seeking revenge with a narcissist would do you any good then do it. But if you love your mental peace and happy life, just leave a narcissist behind and move on.

Author
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Ella Carrillo

Hey Reader, I am Ella, an Online and Offline Therapist holding an experience of 6 years in this field.

From Relationship, Depression, and Personality Disorder to Narcissistic problems, I have helped a lot of people find their solutions. Upon gathering a number of common problems that people face, I decided to put the information on this blog so that anyone can get their answers easily.

What is the Worst Thing You Can Do to a Narcissist? (New Things Added)

What is a Narcissist?