What Happens When You Reject or Ignore a Narcissist?

by Ella Carrillo · December 20, 2022

What happens when you reject or Ignore a Narcissist? A Narcissist is always a difficult person to deal with and it might also drain your mental peace. With such a person, you might not want to get involved or just ignore them while they appear. A Narcissist can be exhausting, and tough to deal with, and your presence might not be valued by them, and you might also lose your self-confidence by being around them.

Can you reject a narcissist? Can you choose not to get involved with them? What would be the consequences of rejecting them or ignoring them? We will be discussing this here, and also provide some answers to these questions. Let us find out the possible outcomes to the question, “What happens when you reject or Ignore a Narcissist?”.

A narcissist can not take “NO” for an answer. Rage becomes their coping mechanism for anything displeasing like rejection or ignorance. Rejection means what a narcissist perceives is they are not up to the mark for you or they lack somewhere. This makes them even more difficult to deal with. A narcissist thinks that they are nothing but perfect and that nothing can suffice the rejection that they have received.

What Happens When You Reject or Ignore a Narcissist?

Is there a way to get back to a narcissist for their nasty nature? Yes! There is an absolute way to make a narcissist feel weak and undermined? Rejecting or Ignoring a Narcissist is the ultimate way to make a narcissist feel dejected. Their boosted ego may come crashing down, once you reject them or simply ignore them.

But does it affect a narcissist when you reject them or ignore them? Yes! a narcissist fears rejection and hates ignorance. They feel the same as everyone; sad, fearful and hateful when someone rejects and ignores them. But the only difference is their reaction. It does trigger them but they would not express it loudly. They would not demonstrate any loud reaction as this would make them seem benevolent.

What happens when you Reject a Narcissist?

Many reactions and defense mechanisms will provoke a narcissist’s nasty side when you reject them. Let us know some of them here,

They will make you feel dejected
They will say horrible things about you
They might lash out at your
You can secure a space on their hate list
This might lead to them taking an act of revenge on you for this, which can smear your reputation
You might receive unwilling projections from them
They might consider you despicable
Their first reaction would be aggression and hostility
They would be mean and malice
They would resort to Gaslighting you

“Since Narcissists deep down feel themselves to be faultless, it is inevitable that when they are in conflict with the world they will invariably perceive the conflict as the world’s fault.”
-M. Scott Peck

1. They will make you feel dejected

When you reject a narcissist, they make you feel low. They would not be sad, instead, they would make you feel low, that you have done something wrong and that you are rejecting someone very great. Narcissists have a tendency to hide or not express any feelings when you reject them. Rejection does trigger a narcissist but they would not express it loudly. They would avoid a loud reaction as this would make them seem benevolent. They would make you feel small and dispirited.

2. They will say horrible things to you

They would say things like, “Anyways you do not deserve someone like me”, or “I am better off without you” for their vindication against your rejection. They might even spread rumors about them rejecting you when the situation is another way around. They might say things that are not true about you so that you are neglected by all your acquaintances or friends. They would be unhappy about the whole situation and may also jinx you. But do not worry, people notice the truth eventually and you might lose nothing in the end.

3. They might lash out at your

Narcissists cannot bear when they lose control of the situation. They might have expected that you would accept them happily, but when the situation turns another way around and you reject them, their first instinct would be to lash out. They can be brutal and say some things that you might not want to hear.

4. You can secure a space on their hate list

Narcissists take the hate word literally and usually have a long hate list. People make it to this list when they have not done something as per a narcissist’s wish. You may end up on their list because you rejected them, and they may never approach you the same way unless they are genuinely in need of something from you.

What Happens When You Reject or Ignore a Narcissist?
Be ready to be part of the narcissist’s gaslighting game which is toxic. They would catch the phrases, or dialogues and use them against you when you reject them. Gaslighting you can be the topmost priority for a Narcissist once they feel they have been routed.

5. This might lead to them taking an act of revenge on you for this, which can smear your reputation

Narcissists cannot let go of insults that easily. Rejecting them would be considered an insult for them. Do not expect a maturely handled situation when you reject a narcissist. They may create a scene and play the victim here. They would blame you for giving them signs that lead them to such a situation. They might also plan something bad that can even smear your reputation. They may resent you for a long time.

6. You might receive unwilling projections from them

Usually, projections are an outcome of self-guilt and deprived self-reflection. A narcissistic person lacks both. Narcissists have low self-esteem and the lowest capacity to acknowledge insecurities. Narcissistic projections are like their hidden superpower according to them. They use it out of nowhere and leave you perplexed. They use these projections as a defense mechanism when they feel they would be exposed or their grandiose image is being questioned or tarnished.

7. They might consider you despicable

When you reject a narcissist they make an evil image of you in their mind. They would spread false accusations. They would also tell people that you have ill intentions and that your actions are despicable. When in reality they are the one who has nasty behavior and reputation. A narcissist may mirror the same emotions as theirs when you reject them.

8. Their first reaction would be aggression and hostility

When something you said triggers a narcissist, their first reaction is aggression and hostility. Your rejection may trigger a narcissist’s ill-intended side and thus they may act viciously or harshly toward you. They would be all hyped up and agitated to provide a counter-argument that satisfies their ego and proves that they are right and have been wrongly been rejecting.

9. They would be mean and malicious

You rejecting them might not be a big deal for you, but for them, it hurt their pride and ego. As they think they are the perfect individual that everyone deserves and adores. So when you reject them, they feel they are defeated somehow and would fight back vigorously saying mean things and planning malicious actions that would stain your honor.

What Happens When You Reject or Ignore a Narcissist?
A narcissist can not take “NO” for an answer. Rage becomes their coping mechanism for anything displeasing like rejection or ignorance. Rejection means what a narcissist perceives is they are not up to the mark for you or they lack somewhere.

10. They would resort to Gaslighting you

Be ready to be part of the narcissist’s gaslighting game which is toxic. They would catch the phrases, or dialogues and use them against you when you reject them. Gaslighting you can be the topmost priority for a Narcissist once they feel they have been routed.

Some other consequences include,

They might hoover around you until you give in and accept them.
They might provide fake apologies or be gullible.
They would make fake promises about them changing and becoming their better versions.
They might just drop the idea of convincing you and move on to lure someone else to make you jealous.

What happens when you Ignore a Narcissist?

A Narcissist craves attention all the time. So if you ignore them, they might try to gain you back in their life or would not allow you to move away. For this, they would do anything possible in their power. There are various possibilities and outcomes on how would a narcissist react to being ignored. Let us know them further.

When a narcissist wants your attention desperately they might,

They would reach out to your family members and other known acquaintances to grab your attention
They would stalk you
They would try all means to win you or gain your attention
They would show you what you are missing
They would act all gullible
They would speak ill of you and tell all sorts of made-up lies about you

What Happens When You Reject or Ignore a Narcissist?
A narcissist fears rejection and hates ignorance. They feel the same as everyone; sad, fearful and hateful when someone rejects and ignores them. But the only difference is their reaction. It does trigger them but they would not express it loudly. They would not demonstrate any loud reaction as this would make them seem benevolent.

1. They would reach out to your family members and other known acquaintances to grab your attention

Once you ignore a narcissist by ignoring their texts, and calls, or even deny meeting them, that’s the time they start noting you with extra attention or reaching out to family members, friends, colleagues, or any acquaintances just to know your whereabouts and your next moves. Narcissists hate it when they lose control. This is the last thing they want, losing control over you. Their wish may be grabbing your attention by all means.

2. They would stalk you

When narcissists run out of ways to gain your attention, they might resort to unconventional means like stalking. This is an uncommon behavior though, but you cannot judge a narcissist. So be prepared mentally. They might show up at places like your workplace, stalk you through social media, and even post something which is unfavorable to you. So always be careful while dealing with a narcissist.

3. They would try all means to win you or gain your attention

A narcissist can do anything to impress you and get your attention. They would try to use flattery, would help you, wish you and greet you on daily basis, would say all good things about you, or may make you feel special. From love bombing you, stalking you, following you, surprising you, breaking your confidence, showing your dependency on them, emotional manipulation, to all sorts of tactics, a narcissist would not back off until they notice some progress in their endeavors and gain your attention.

They would even try to compliment you, try to remind you how lucky they are to have you, would tell all sorts of lies to gain your attention when you ignore them. They would make it seem that you are dependent on them for many activities, and your survival would be jeopardized without them.

4. They would show you what you are missing

Narcissists would make you feel guilty when you ignore them and may also play games with you. You would be so intimated by them, that you would not understand why you are feeling so. They would make you vulnerable and jealous. They would post on social media about the fun and happy places that they visit and may tag you to make you jealous, they would make it seem that they are enjoying life and that you have made a mistake ignoring them or rejecting them.

5. They would act all gullible

All of a sudden they would be full of emotions and sensitivity and would also act like they can do anything for gaining your attention. But remember, this is all until they gain your attention. They would act gullible and would be ready to change for you. But remember gullibility does not suit a narcissist and they would show hardly any changes once they have your attention. They would do anything to lull your ignorance.

6. They would speak ill of you and tell all sorts of made-up lies about you

A narcissist would not even hesitate to speak ill of you just to get your attention. They would tell all made-up lies just so that you talk to them or confront them.

In Conclusion

Does it affect a narcissist when you reject them or ignore them? – Yes! a narcissist fears rejection and hates ignorance. They feel the same as everyone; sad, fearful and hateful when someone rejects and ignores them. But the only difference is their reaction. It does trigger them but they would not express it loudly. They would not demonstrate any loud reaction as this would make them seem benevolent.

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Ella Carrillo

Hey Reader, I am Ella, an Online and Offline Therapist holding an experience of 6 years in this field.

From Relationship, Depression, and Personality Disorder to Narcissistic problems, I have helped a lot of people find their solutions. Upon gathering a number of common problems that people face, I decided to put the information on this blog so that anyone can get their answers easily.

What Happens When You Reject or Ignore a Narcissist?

What Happens When You Reject or Ignore a Narcissist?