The Vicious Relationship Between Narcissists and Empaths
Why is the relationship between narcissists and empaths so dangerous? Empaths often get tangled with people who are abusive and take advantage of them. Why does that happen? To know this let us understand the vicious relationship between Narcissists and Empaths.
If you are empathetic you may always be attracted to toxic people, people who are suffering emotionally and need healing, because as an empath you feel it is your responsibility to spread love and reduce hate from the world.
What is a Narcissist?
Narcissists are often characterized by their boosted sense of self-importance, self-pride, and self-needs. With a narcissist, everything is just about them. Narcissists thrive upon the attention, adoration, and validation that they receive from others, and what makes them distinguished from others is the way they think and the way they behave, which is selfish and mean.
Narcissists have huge egos to satisfy and when someone hurts their ego, that someone is doomed. Narcissists seek revenge, or at least they would humiliate and devalue you for hurting their pride and ego.
Narcissists tend to use people for their needs and desires. They just seek attention and control. They believe the world revolves around them and are entitled to whatever they desire.
What is an Empath?
In simple words, individuals who are capable of possessing, conveying, and exhibiting empathy in a copious amount than an average person can be tagged as empaths. Empathy is a fascinating emotion that gives a person the superpowers to understand, care, and think for others even before their own needs. Empaths naturally possess selflessness which makes them cherished by almost everyone around them.
An Empath or an empathic person is someone capable of feeling empathy, having a lot of empathy for others, and is highly emotionally sensitive too. Empaths also make sure not to hurt someone by their behavior and they do not cause any discomfort to others by their feelings.
Empaths are individuals who are highly sensitive to the feelings of others around them. Empaths can connect with other people’s emotions on a deeper level and can sometimes be overly attached to them.
Some people view empaths in a bright light with a halo around their head as empaths are amazing people to have around you to have a chat with when you are depressed or have a lot going on in life and also get appropriate advice as empaths can reciprocate pain on a deeper level. They can soak in all emotions that you project onto them and process, refine, and reciprocate those emotions with comfort words as what you need in tough times.
One can say that Empaths have a superpower, but this may also lead to some people viewing them in a negative light as they might be jealous of empaths. Jealsouy because empaths are people who almost everyone likes. But sometimes empathy can also put the person in a place where they too might get tired of receiving, perceiving, and dealing with so much emotional trauma. Sometimes being an empath may be burdensome for you self and also it can pull down your emotional well-being and psychological health.
Why are Empaths and Narcissists attracted to each other? – The Vicious Relationship Between Narcissists and Empaths
Empaths are compassionate and they attract people who lack care, love, and empathy. Narcissists and empaths are mutually attracted to each other due to this reason. When an empath meets a narcissist something triggers the empath and a need to comfort the narcissist immediately develops thus they comfort the narcissist.
When a narcissist is comforted by an empath, this begins the cycle of narcissistic supply for the narcissist. The empath provides what a narcissist craves and thus their relationship is interdependent.
Narcissists and Empaths have an intriguing relationship because narcissists are individuals with a lot of internal conflicts, and imbalance and lack that emotional bonding that is required to live effortlessly and happily; while empaths can notice those turmoils that go into narcissists’ minds and lives, and all they do is understand, deal, heal, get hurt but comfort the narcissist.
There are many times, when Narcissists and empaths are attracted to each other because a narcissist craves supply in the form of care, validation, emotional support, and dependency, receiving help in matters, and healing; while an empath just serves them right by providing all that in one platter. Empaths just serve all that a narcissist craves and get manipulated, played, hurt, and in almost all cases end up being used.
Usually, empaths have a subconscious belief that they can heal the narcissists, and often they dedicate themselves to healing the traumatic narcissist, but the wicked and egoistic narcissist would never appreciate and notice their efforts.
The narcissist would always seek the benefit of the empath, yet there is an undeniable attraction between them. The relationship can be more troublesome for the empath if they have codependent tendencies. In such a case the narcissist would clearly seek advantage of the empath by considering the empath’s compassion and empathy as signs of weaknesses.
Narcissists often exploit the empaths. Empaths have this need for love and fulfillment and thus they would bear the narcissist’s cycle of abusive behavior. The narcissist would continuously manipulate, abuse, and use the empath as the scapegoat for their distraught and dysfunctional feelings and emotions.
The narcissists would portray themselves as the victims and the empaths would treat them as one by caring for them, validating them, and also supporting them. But the bitter reality here is that the empath is the real victim here.
The narcissists keep on seeking advantage of the empath, and the empath gives on giving them what they desire because empaths are morally bound beings, and they feel it is their responsibility to heal the victimized narcissist. Thus the toxic bond between an over-caring empath and a selfish narcissist keeps growing and becoming more and more abusive for the empath.
Being attracted to the empath, a Narcissist still fears the empath on some levels as the empath is not focusing on the same needs as them. The empath is constantly trying to heal the narcissist and when the narcissist becomes aware of this, they start fearing the empath as empaths know all about the narcissist’s negative side and can see right through them.
Narcissists constantly fear that the empath might disclose their real egotistic self, tear down that false image that they have created, and disarm them with their healing. Thus narcissists fear an empath and the empaths have an upper hand in such situations.
So there are both possibilities. So it is you who decides who would hold the power in the relationship being the emotional support of the relationship, the empath.
How to protect yourself from a Narcissist?
Narcissists can be some of the most difficult people to deal with especially if you are closely related to them. Here are easy ways in which you can protect yourself as an empath from the narcissist,
Setting clear boundaries
Boundaries can ensure that the narcissist is unable to repeat their abusive behavioral pattern once more. Once you deny a certain type of behavior to be acceptable, it may hurt their ego and may also provoke their negative response, but they would not dare or at least think twice before acting in a certain way. They can be angry too.
Do not give second chances to them
There are no second chances when you are dealing with Narcissists, as they are not going to be manipulative despite the amount of chances provided to them to change or be a better person.
The moment the narcissist starts feeling they are losing you, they may do anything to keep you in the relationship. They will put their best foot forward to trick you and once they have you they might go back to their abusive and manipulative ways. This is how their trauma bond works.
Take an outsider’s perspective
When someone else points out the flaws of your relationship, it is when you accept and realize how abusive your relationship is. You may be fooled and might be tricked into believing that narcissist would appreciate your presence in their life as an empath, but you may be incorrect.
You may be hopeful as an empath for the things you bring to the relationship, but only to realize what a one-sided relationship you may be hoping for yourself. Thus taking an outsider’s perspective may help you with an unbiased opinion on the abusive relationship and also help you set boundaries.
Remember that the narcissist is not reciprocating
Despite the positivity, support, and unbiased emotions that you may be bringing to the relationship, the narcissist is never going to understand your worth. According to them, they are the greatest and the best partners someone could get. So just forget the idea of receiving the reciprocating feelings when you have a narcissistic partner as an empath victim.
Can therapy be of any help in such vicious relationships?
A therapist holds the power to show you the mirror of reality as an empath dating a narcissist. They can show the issues and challenges both partners may be facing.
A couple’s therapy may work at its best and may also allow you to make your vicious relationship a fulfilled one. So when you realize or someone else brings the realization to you just take action immediately.
Seek help from a mental health expert or clinician who can help you with your dysfunctional relationship. Though seeking help when you have a narcissist as your partner can be challenging, there is always hope and the universe helping you through difficult times.
Just be hopeful and have patience and you may notice how your relationship with the narcissist is getting better.
Final Thoughts
If the empath is not emotionally well or stable and is not a strong-hearted individual who is unaware of how to utilize and apply their superpower thoroughly, then such empaths might suffer a little at the cost of healing the narcissist. They can even become an easy target for the narcissist and might get tortured and tangled a bit with the narcissist’s manipulative tricks and tactics.
Empaths also have the power to expose the narcissist which the narcissist fears. So it is in your hands an as empath, to drive the relationship in a desired manner. You can make it blissful or you can make it vicious. So choose wisely.
So there are both possibilities. So it is you who decides who would hold the power in the relationship being the emotional support of the relationship, the empath.
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