Will a Narcissist Miss You Once You are Gone?

by Ella Carrillo · January 30, 2023

Will a Narcissist Miss You Once You are Gone? When you date someone you obviously develop some kind of attachment even though the relationship you had can be toxic. It is obvious you would develop a connection when you date someone, and when you leave them it hurts and you miss that person.

You give your every ounce of love to the person you are dating, and also expect the same. But would it be any worth loving a person who cannot reciprocate the same tenacity of love? For whom you cannot even be sure, that they might actually have feelings for you or would miss you if you leave them?

What does breaking up with a narcissist be like? Will a Narcissist miss you once you are gone?

Yes, there can be some instances where you would not receive what you give in a relationship, but do all those people are narcissists?

No! It would be wrong to tag everyone who does not reciprocate your love, is toxic, or does not care for your feelings. But how is it dating a narcissist? What if you are dating a narcissist? Dating a narcissist is itself challenging. You have to keep up with their unrealistic expectations, tantrums, emotional unavailability, and peculiar traits. A Narcissist can make you feel like you are on cloud nine for one moment and the next moment is like they don’t even know you. So dating a narcissist is almost unpredictable. You would obviously miss them despite their toxicity due to their irresistible charm, but the question comes to them, Will a Narcissist miss you once you are gone?

The answer to this question is dubious. On one hand, they can miss you indeed, but in reality, they would actually miss how you made them feel with your presence. The narcissist is capable of feelings and emotions, but they are so full of themselves that they do not want to understand anybody else’s emotions. They would miss how their ego was satisfied by being with you and how they used to feel good around you as you were the one they would drain energy from.

On the other hand, a narcissist would actually not miss you but they would miss their source of supply with whom they used to boost their thirst for an unquenchable ego. Narcissists would often try to come back into your life until they find a new supply. Supply is everything that makes them important like control, praise, worth, ego boost, and everything that makes them feel superior.

What is Narcissistic supply?

A narcissistic supply is everything that makes a narcissistic life fulfilled. It is that one thing that a narcissist always craves even if it is in its negative forms, that is attention. One can even say that a narcissist is only able to fulfill their life purposes on the basis of supply itself. They feel handicapped without their sources of admiration, attention, validation, importance, and everything that makes them feel special. Narcissists seek supply more than anything, and they could do everything to obtain their dose of supply.

Narcissists are supply junkies. They are so much dependent on the source of supply for validation that they are ready to compromise their self-opinionated self. As we might have seen drug addicts go crazy in movies, in the same way, narcissists just like addicts, behave insanely weirdly and differently when they are unable to secure their narcissistic supply and it becomes their old supply.

Narcissistic supply is one of the prime reasons for them to date commit to a relationship. They do not have love as the first priority, their first priority is obtaining their supply, once they drain you completely out of supply they would leave you or might still have you as their backup source of supply. and Narcissists also have their own stock of narcissistic supply.

A narcissist can miss you but for different reasons and not that you might have thought.

They might miss you for the affection you had for them as everyone especially narcissists craves attention and affection. They might miss your validation for their fake, unreal, and dual personality, they might miss what you did for them, how you made them feel, and the physical intimacy. Narcissists would not actually miss you for who you are or your feelings, but they might miss you for how you made them feel special and entitled and made them your priority.

When you are in a relationship with a narcissist, you gradually realize that everything in your relationship is just about them. Even breaking up is one of the parts which is usually initialized by them as they get bored of you. So let us know, “Will a Narcissist Miss You Once You are Gone?”.

Will a Narcissist miss you once you are gone?

While dating a narcissist, you might continuously be perplexed between loving them and the rue of the adverse treatment you get from them. You might be confused about whether to stay with them or part ways with them. They would not allow you to leave, as you would be lured by their compelling actions and affirmative statements of change.

Dating a narcissist can be perplexing, as you might feel you are dating two different people at the same time because sometimes you might feel you are the love of their life because they make you feel like you are someone utterly special. While there are times you might even doubt your place in their life. They would not think twice before hurting, humiliating, and assaulting verbally. You might even feel that while dating them you understand the meaning of both love and toxic love while dating them.

Narcissists can miss you indeed, but in reality, most of the time it is that they would actually miss how you made them. feel with your presence. A narcissist is capable of feeling all emotions, it is just that they d not acknowledge them and express them due to their vulnerabilities. They fear expressing emotions can make them emotionally weak and vulnerable to their partner. They fear that once they surrender to their feelings they might lose control. So due to this insecurity of them, their partner at many times would feel ignored, unloved, and would feel left out and would also plan on leaving the relationship as they might feel unloved.

Why would a Narcissist miss you? – Reasons for a Narcissist to miss you?

There are various reasons for a narcissist to come crawling back to you, which are mentioned here, so even though a narcissist breaks up with you they would want to keep you as a backup as their supply source.

A narcissist never wants to lose control over you

When a Narcissist loses control over you, they feel empty. A Narcissist is an individual who is excessively obsessed to have control over all situations in their life or control over all individuals, and when they lose control over you they feel something is missing. So they would definitely want to continue the friendship even as exes to gain back their control over you.

They always want to keep you as a backup option for their source of supply

A narcissist is always in search of supply, so a Narcissist would always want you to continue as friends even after breaking the relationship as romantic partners, so this depends upon you whether to be their victim again by accepting their offer.

Narcissists have a sense of entitlement which they fulfill with the help of the supply. They do not view a human as a human with needs, emotional attachment, or any source of emotional connection. They first view them as their source of supply, weigh their positives and negatives, and then proceed with them and visualize them as humans with substantial needs. Everybody craves attention, but in the case of narcissists, they crave constant and undivided attention.

They would want to keep a door open for physical intimacy

A Narcissist craves physical intimacy, and when you are the most vulnerable (that is after your break up) they would insist that upon you. They would not tell you this upfront but would try to lure you for physical intimacy as soon as you try to recover from a breakup. They will play all sorts of love tactics to manipulate you and your thoughts just to keep you as an option for intimacy. It also can be like a “Friends with benefits” situation. But once they get what they want to achieve, again they would show their true colors.

They would want to keep tabs on you

Keeping tabs means checking on their exes and keeping a track of their activities. Narcissists often do this to ensure that their exes are not getting ahead of them. When they feel their ex is at the most vulnerable time of their life they would bounce back to secure supply from them.

Narcissists have an elevated sense of entitlement which makes them feel superior and allows them to behave as they wish without considering anyone’s feelings. Sometimes their conduct may even cross the social bounds of society. They are desire-driven beings who let their desires, lust, and pleasure control them.

Lack of closure

Narcissists would just be MIA(Missing in Action) keeping you completely uninformed and they would return as if nothing ever happened and the relationship continues the same way before. They would lure you into believing that you never broke up, which would make you question who dumped whom, or “Is this really happening?”. So make sure you provide them a complete closure or they would be coming back for sure.

When you leave a narcissist, they would not be able to bear the consequences as rejection is totally a no-no. They would try to win their old supply over when they have no fresh or new source of supply.

Narcissists linger around you for a while even after leaving you for someone else to check how you are doing. They never completely cut ties with their exes, until they have completely benefitted from you. They do not feel guilty or repent after breaking up but their only fear is the lack of supply. They do tend to keep contact with their exes or even try to be together again after breaking up or giving the silent treatment, to satisfy their ego. They want to know how miserable you are after they have left you!

A narcissist never wants to lose control over you.
They always want to keep you as a backup option.
They would want to keep a door open for physical intimacy.
They might come back when they want some monetary gains from you.
Narcissists can be the most difficult people, so they may come around to gain emotional support from you.
They would come back to obtain their dose of narcissistic supply.

How to Make a Narcissist Miss You and Regret Losing You?

There are ways in which you can make a narcissist miss you so let us know them,

Make new friends or date different people
Going no contact or cutting complete contact
Do not worry about what would a narcissist think
Understand that there is no remorse when dealing with a narcissist
Choose self-care
Let the narcissist know what they are missing when they are not with you
By not seeking a revenge

1. Make new friends or date different people

Making new friends or dating different people would certainly draw a narcissist’s attention especially when they are still single and you have already moved on.

Happiness is what matters ultimately. Just because you met someone like your narcissistic ex-partner, does not mean everyone would be the same. The other benefit is that your happiness would create a commotion in a narcissist’s life. Date new people, be around someone better, or make new friends; these steps are just enough to draw a narcissist toward you, and also make them regret leaving you.

When you make new friends or meet new people a narcissist would be unhappy about it, as they just want to isolate you and keep you just for themselves. So meeting new friends, dating someone new, or talking to new people would make them more anxious and miss you.

2. Going no contact or cutting complete contact

Discard them from your life like they never existed for you. Just avoid them, avoid any form of communication source, block them, and even disregard them by all means. When they try contacting your family, friends, or acquaintances, ask them to avoid the narcissist. Do not pick up calls, block them from social media, or just do not meet them.

Give the silent treatment to a narcissist, they would just be vexed by your behavior. Narcissists are the most self-centered beings and every relationship you have with them is just about them and their benefits. So going no contact or cutting contact with them is very important for you to secure your mental peace and happy life ahead. Just be selfish and only think about yourself and your well-being.

This will definitely make them think about you and regret leaving you and somehow miss you.

3. Do not worry about what would a narcissist think

Do not worry about what would a narcissist think, just be stress-free and enjoy your life.

If they ask you to help them, you can clearly state that you would not help as you two are totally not dating anymore. Denying them multiple times would ensure that they have lost control over you and that you no longer want to be acquainted with them. As narcissists need total control, this would stir a storm in their minds, and would try to gain you back and would definitely regret losing you from their life.

4. Understand that there is no remorse when dealing with a narcissist

Do not beg a narcissist, go back to them, or be dependent on them by any means. Avoid them, and do not reconcile with them through their shallow promises. Make up your mind firmly and just leave them. This will definitely make them think about you and regret leaving you and somehow miss you as they are used to taking advantage of you and when you cut ties they lose their supply. Beseeching them would give them power, instead just avoid them and this would just create a commotion and also a feeling to gain back control. Thus they would miss you.

5. Choose self-care

Celebrate your little victories, consult a therapist, get help from loved ones, be grateful for what you have rather than what is lost, sleep well, eat well, stay with family, be positive and live well. Choosing self-care and being unattainable is the best to make a narcissist regret leaving you. A narcissist would always expect you to be sad and lonely, but prove them wrong and be the best version of yourself.

This would definitely attract a narcissist’s attention as they would think you are full of supply and thus they would want to reconcile with you or be willing to meet you, by stating that they miss you and your company.

Working on your self-confidence, your goals, and mental peace in mental health aspects. Exercise more, take a proper diet, and build up your physical health. By doing so you can make a narcissist jealous and that would shoo them off. This ensures your well-being.

6. Let the narcissist know what they are missing when they are not with you

Let the narcissist know what they are missing when they are not with you is the best way to make them regret their decision of leaving you or breaking up with you.

Showing a narcissist how happy you are without them can just make them jealous. Proving that you are happy without them can intimidate a narcissist making them annoyed. Narcissists totally envy that you are happy without them. They feel that they are losing their importance in your life. They are scared that you can also be independently happy without them.

Posting about your happy life on social media through photographs would leave a narcissist wondering and pissed. Try to flaunt your happiness by appreciating your life, your other friends, and all the blessings you have that exclude them. This can totally set off the mood for a narcissist and they would regret it as a narcissist is active on social media flaunting their life, but seeing their ex happy would completely draw their attention.

7. By not seeking a revenge

Revenge is not always the answer to all the suffering. Focusing on living a better life is more important than seeking revenge. By doing so you would grow flawlessly and even be the bigger person here. Being the bigger person would hurt their pride, ruin their ego, and would make them regret their decision.

If seeking revenge with a narcissist would do you any good then do it. But if you love your mental peace and happy life, just leave a narcissist behind and move on. Moving on would draw their attention as they cannot lose control over you.

There is no need as such to seek revenge just to fulfill the compulsive need or out of pressure. You can live more peacefully by being the bigger person here and leaving without creating drama. Just focus on your self-growth and healing. Seeking no revenge means you no longer care for a narcissist.

Inference

A narcissist can miss you but for different reasons and not that you might have thought.

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Ella Carrillo

Hey Reader, I am Ella, an Online and Offline Therapist holding an experience of 6 years in this field.

From Relationship, Depression, and Personality Disorder to Narcissistic problems, I have helped a lot of people find their solutions. Upon gathering a number of common problems that people face, I decided to put the information on this blog so that anyone can get their answers easily.

Will a Narcissist Miss You Once You are Gone?