The Narcissist and Money Control (Covert Narcissists – Will they Spend Money on you?)

by Ella Carrillo · December 12, 2022

Let us discuss one of the crucial aspects that a narcissist controls you, “The Narcissist and Money Control”. Are narcissists materialistic? What is a covert narcissist? Can a narcissist be stingy or would be spending money for you? We will be catering to all such questions here, with the help of this article which will be discussing covert narcissists and their will to spend money along with, “The Narcissist and Money Control”.

The Narcissist and Money Control

Are narcissists obsessed with money control? Do they spend money on you? The answer to these questions is Yes and a big yes! Narcissists and money are directly proportional to each other. Money brings power or is a tool for expressing power.

Money commonly opens up a passage for opportunities, possibilities, and comfort. So a narcissist is a head over heels for money. Narcissist loves anything that gives them power, and thus they are connected closely. Some common expressions that relate narcissists and their obsession with money are,

They will be talking about their financial conditions more often obtaining self-pity and financial assistance.
They would be providing you with expensive gifts but would make it a point that they remind you about that more often.
They will stress you out about their financial struggles.
They can be stingy at times.
Overspending, seeking loans, or just not spending a nickel can be very commonly observed behaviors of narcissists.

Are narcissists obsessed over money?

Who does not love money? Everyone loves that power, fulfillment, and achievement when their bank accounts are making the “CHA-CHING” sound. But narcissists have a little different perspective and connection with money.

Earning ample is good as long as it does not become an obsession. Money is required for almost all functions of life. It is at times even motivating. But when it becomes an obsession, which leaves you restless, which makes you compromise with other people’s peace of mind, or gives you power over them then it can be a warning and even harmful.

The Narcissist and Money Control
Narcissists may have a better relationship with money than with you at times which can be unhealthy. They might even have a malignant desire for money that can ruin your relationship.

A malignant desire for money can ruin relationships and can make you seem desperate and even you are ready to hurt other people for money. When this happens it is called money obsession. Narcissists may or may not have a money obsession, but they would never allow spoiling their lustrous high-end image, so they are little inclined to the side of money obsession.

Narcissists would not even mind spending your hard-earned money on their unrealistic desires but would hoard their money. They can even ask for lending them and you might never get your money back. They may even embezzle money while difficult times. They would always ask you to pay everywhere, and they would ask you to fulfill their desires at whatever cost.

Is a narcisist money spender? – How to know if your narcissistic partner is a vexatious money spender?

Narcissists may have a better relationship with money than with you at times which can be unhealthy. They like to detrimentally earn even at the cost of other people’s loss, and maintain their shiny image even if they are at the edge of going bankrupt, they can also stoop low using their entitlement card with you.

All a narcissist cares about is attention, supply, shiny high-end portrait, money, and control above all. So until they have all this, they would not be bugging you extremely, but as soon as one of the things starts deteriorating they can make such a fuss, which makes you question your life choices.

Narcissists are usually materialistic and obsessed with everything which makes their social image lustrous. Money is one such factor that can fulfill all their materialistic desires, thus they can be consumed by money.

Traits representing the Narcissist and Money Control distinctly

There are various traits representing the Narcissist and Money Control more distinctly,

A narcissist always feels a sense of entitlement which also includes YOUR MONEY.
They would spend your money on everything they desire but would save theirs. “They would not blink twice when it is your money and not theirs.”
They would also appreciate your presence in their life, unless you provide them with what they wish, money, control, supply, and more money.
They can convince you for paying for them all the time. They have this undeniable argument where you cannot drawback but have to pay.
They can lure you with their glaze, which you might even readily spend for them.
They would gift you with your own money. Funny as it sounds, but yes! a narcissist can do that and you might not even ask twice.
Their money is theirs but your money is also theirs.
They may hide or hoard their money and lie recklessly with a puppy face that they are struggling financially.
Narcissists lack emotional attachment so they highly depend on materialistic possessions like money.
Narcissists try to impress others and establish grandiosity by showing off their materialistic assets.
To fulfill their empty and shallow life, narcissists gain attention, praise, and whatever they need to present their grandiosity of life.
“All that glitters is not gold” is very true in the case of a narcissist. As narcissists present themselves to be nearly perfect humans who are superior to others in all aspects, but once you get closure with them, you identify their reality and their true selves.

Narcissists can be obsessed with money or you can say they like money. But more than that, they like the premonitions that come attached to money like power, appreciation, esteem, respect, and attention from others. They like money because money is the medium through which they channel or manifest all they want.

The Narcissist and Money Control
Narcissists will be talking about their financial conditions more often obtaining self-pity and financial assistance. Can be stingy at times and also will stress you out about their financial struggles.

The Narcissist and Money Control – Detailed explanation of narcissists and the money control

There are certain toxic habits that narcissists possess even when it comes to financial matters. Let us know some common matters where a narcissist can bother you about money matters and money control,

1. They are deceitful when it comes to spending money

A narcissist would readily spend money for you publically when there is a situation to show off or be extravagant. They would be spending on unnecessary things in public or while out with social circle, but when it comes to spending privately they would be all stingy and would not be bothered to care for your needs.

2. Their expenses can be futile just relating to grandiosity and not needs

Narcissists try to impress others and establish grandiosity by showing off their materialistic assets. To fulfill their empty and shallow life, narcissists gain attention, praise, and whatever they need to present their grandiosity of life.

For instance, they would be traveling and spending money just to post it on social media, while in reality, they can even be on a verge of breaking down financially. They would spend on things for attention and might cut down on essentials that are needed to survive.

3. They are the humbugs of the money matters

Narcissists would extravagantly spend on themselves, but when it comes to spending money on you or some joint ventures of spending money they would just cut off those and blame you for spending too much.

4. Narcissists are stingy

Narcissists would not use a penny for someone unless and until it benefits them. They can be selfish on important payments and would also not share the pay for their part in many instances.

5. They would moot about the purchases they made for you

They would always mention and boast about the expensive gifts they might have gifted. They would also appreciate your presence in their life, unless you provide them with what they wish, money, control, supply, and more money. They can convince you for paying for them all the time. They have this undeniable argument where you cannot drawback but have to pay. They can lure you with their glaze, which you might even readily spend for them.

The Narcissist and Money Control
Narcissists would not even mind spending your hard-earned money on their unrealistic desires but would hoard their money. They can even ask for lending them and you might never get your money back. They may even embezzle money while difficult times.

The Narcissist and Money Control – Covert Narcissists – Will they Spend Money on you?

What is a Covert Narcissist? How do you identify covert narcissists? Will they Spend Money on you? Let us know about the types of narcissists, and understand more about covert narcissism and their ideas to spend money on you.

What are the types of narcissists who have been identified by experts?

According to mental health experts and psychologists, there are some common types that define a narcissistic personality in a being suffering from NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder). There are majorly five main types namely Overt, Covert, Malignant, Communal, and Antagonist Narcissism.

Though every human possesses these traits in a neutral capacity which is more or less not harmful, but people with NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) possess and manifest these traits more than usual which can be harmful to them and to the people around them. Thus making it tough for people around them to deal with them. Narcissists possess and reveal these traits in obscene volumes.

So if you come across any type you know how to recognize their traits. The most common and peculiar types are as mentioned below,

Grandiose (Unconcealed/Overt)

Grandiose or Overt Narcissism is the most common type observed among narcissists. This type of narcissistic personality displays an unconcealed act of aggression openly and struggles to hide their aggression socially. They constantly try to prove their worth, thinking about how others think of them, proving their superiority over others, and much more.

Some peculiar traits of Grandiose Narcissism are, aggressiveness, arrogance, constant need to gain attention, and most importantly they are self-absorbed. They are the extroverts of the NPD group.

Covert (Dainty)

This type of narcissistic personality does not display any symptoms openly but is closely associated with mental health issues in terms of anxiety and depression. It is the complete opposite type of overt narcissism.

Narcissists are recognized for their loud and noticeable behaviors but that is not the case with Covert Narcissism. Some peculiar traits of covert narcissists are, they can associate more with childhood trauma, they are introverted and shy, have low self-esteem, are always in a need to play the victim, moreover are repulsive to criticism.

Malignant

As the name suggests, malignant narcissists possess traits like ill intentions, hurting others, spitefulness, and revenge-seeking.

Communal

It is the opposite of the Antagonist type and some peculiar traits include, moral exploitation, describing themselves for something they are not, and expressing through loud and noticeable reactions.

Antagonist

This is the least recognizable type as they do not show or possess any of the above mentioned symptoms, but only act self-centered, exploit others and take advantage in certain situations like a failure or loss.

Let us know more about covert narcissists,

The Narcissist and Money Control
“All that glitters is not gold” is very true in the case of a narcissist. As narcissists present themselves to be nearly perfect humans who are superior to others in all aspects, but once you get closure with them, you identify their reality and their true selves.

What is a Covert Narcissist? – Or who can be termed under a Covert Narcissist tag?

Covert Narcissism is associated with individuals who are not extravagant or more outwardly regarding their personality disorder. They do not exhibit or associate much with external stereotypical traits of a narcissist like grandiose, luster, and overtness. This does not mean they do not possess narcissistic traits or are aloof from the narcissistic personality disorder.

This simply means that they have been diagnosed with NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) but are introverts or inward people of the NPD group. As per the dictionary meaning of the word covert, it refers to “not openly displayed or shown”. So covert narcissism or covert narcissists do not show or display stereotypical traits but still possess some vigorous traits.

Narcissists are usually recognized for their loud and noticeable behaviors but that is not the case with Covert Narcissism. Some peculiar traits of covert narcissists are, they can associate more with childhood trauma, they are introverted and shy, have low self-esteem, are always in a need to play the victim, moreover are repulsive to criticism.

The Narcissist and Money Control
Narcissists can be obsessed with money or you can say they like money. But more than that, they like the premonitions that come attached to money like power, appreciation, esteem, respect, and attention from others. They like money because money is the medium through which they channel or manifest all they want.

Covert Narcissists – Will they Spend Money on you?

Covert narcissists may come across as simple-minded and polite with money matters. But it is not what it looks like. A covert narcissist may not spend money on you privately but when it comes to spending money publically, they would be grandiose about that. A covert narcissist may spend money on you but mention it multiple times.

For instance, they would be gifting you expensive stuff of their choice and also provide a bill saying, “If you want to exchange this in case you do not like it”. They might also suggest that you may require the bill for further maintenance and thus disclose the amount they invested for you on the expensive gift.

Important Takeaway

Covert Narcissists – Will they Spend Money on you? – Covert narcissists may come across as simple-minded and polite with money matters. But it is not what it looks like. A covert narcissist may not spend money on you privately but when it comes to spending money publically, they would be grandiose about that.

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Ella Carrillo

Hey Reader, I am Ella, an Online and Offline Therapist holding an experience of 6 years in this field.

From Relationship, Depression, and Personality Disorder to Narcissistic problems, I have helped a lot of people find their solutions. Upon gathering a number of common problems that people face, I decided to put the information on this blog so that anyone can get their answers easily.