How Long Will A Narcissist Rebound Relationship Last? (Will It Last Longer?)

by Ella Carrillo · April 13, 2023

How Long Will A Narcissist Rebound Relationship Last? Narcissists need rebound relationships as soon as they discard their previous partner or vice versa. Narcissistic relationships change with the weather you can say. A narcissist’s pattern of behavior often includes a rebound relationship to replace the void left by their previous partner. But how long does such a rebound relationship last, and is it likely to last longer?

Many of us might have come across such individuals in our personal or professional lives. Narcissists are known for their arrogance, self-centeredness, and disregard for others’ emotions. For them, relationships are about receiving admiration and adoration from their partners rather than giving and nurturing.

Narcissists are people who follow a certain pattern of dating or have an autopilot dating cycle. They are creatures of habit, so if the first attempt at a relationship does not work out with someone, they might repeat the same dating cycle with the next person too. So by this calculation, you can know for how long they would be willing to have a relationship with you. Let us know more about the Narcissist dating cycle which may help you determine the period of narcissistic relationships.

What is a Rebound Relationship?

A rebound relationship is a romantic relationship that initiates as soon as the previous romantic relationship ends. A rebound relationship usually starts when a person is still processing the emotional fallout from the breakup. Rebound relationships are often seen as a way to distract oneself from the pain of a breakup or to quickly fill the void left by the previous relationship. They may lack the emotional connection, depth, and required intimacy of an established relationship and may also not be as sustainable in the long term.

Reasons Why a narcissist might quickly need a Rebound Relationship after Breaking Up with their former partner?

1. Fear of being Alone/ Fear of Abandonment

Narcissists have a deep-seated fear of abandonment and being alone. They cannot bear the stage where they are left all alone, as they are dependent on others to fulfill their emotional needs, and being alone may trigger feelings of inadequacy, loneliness, and worthlessness. Narcissists constantly need someone to fill the emotional void in their life. When narcissists cannot find the attention, validation, or required admiration, they experience anxiety, and distress and feel ignored.

Narcissists are empty shells from the inside, they are so hollow from within in terms of emotions that they fear themselves and their empty lives. To avoid these negative emotions, a narcissist will avoid being alone and seek out so they constantly seek out relationships and social situations in which they can receive constant attention and admiration.

2. Need for control

Narcissists cannot function easily in their daily lives without establishing their control as it is a part of their narcissistic supply. They often feel the need to control their partners in the relationship. Thus a rebound relationship might help them to easily and quickly establish their control and dominate the relationship. They are least concerned about the qualities their partner possesses, or their traits, all they need for their partners is to provide a narcissistic supply which includes constant admiration, validation, boosting the narcissist’s ego, and following their dominance so that they feel contented and fulfilled.

3. Ego Boost

Narcissist expects constant attention, validation, and approbation from their partners or their source of supply, so when they discard their former partner, a rebound relationship is their quick fix to boost their ego and make them feel desirable and wanted. When a narcissist has left alone, they may not be able to receive that ego boost and false validation so they constantly involve in relationships and their dating cycle continues.

4. Emotional Avoidance

Narcissists often have difficulty dealing with their own emotions and may use a rebound relationship as a way to avoid processing their feelings about their previous partner. Narcissists cannot face the emotional turmoil that one faces after breaking up, hence to avoid that they quickly get into a rebound relationship just to fulfill their needs through narcissistic supply. They hardly care about the depth, emotional connection, or bond that is required in a relationship, as a rebound relationship is their escape from facing their own emotions after a breakup.

5. Fear of missing out (FOMO)

FOMO is a real deal for narcissists as they are prone to fear of missing out. This fear does not allow them to be alone for a long time as they feel they are missing out on someone better, or they are lacking something that others have (here a partner, or a romantic relationship). Thus to avoid FOMO, narcissists quickly jump from one relationship to another after a breakup to avoid being left out.

6. Revenge

If a narcissist is discarded by their partners, then the deal becomes a deal of rejection or hurt. Narcissists cannot just bear the fact that they have been discarded by someone, so just to show their previous partners out of jealousy and take an act of revenge on them by flaunting their new partners, they quickly opt for a rebound relationship as soon as they break up. A rebound relationship is a way to get at their ex and prove that they are desirable, attractive, and wanted by others. They would also try to prove how their rebound relationship is far better than their previous relationship.

How Long Will A Narcissist Rebound Relationship Last? – The average length of a rebound relationship for narcissists

There are certain factors that determine the average length of a rebound relationship that narcissists quickly involve themselves in. Certain important factors have been discussed below,

New partner’s willingness to engage in the toxic relationship – If the new partner is unaware of the manipulative and toxic behavior of the narcissist then the rebound relationship may last longer as the new partner might be tolerating to not t disappoint the narcissist the relationship is new. But if the new partner does not want to involve in a toxic relationship as they might get a hint about the narcissist’s behavioral tactics and if the new partner wants to save themselves from the troubles of dating a narcissist then the relationship[p may end quickly.

The Narcissist’s ability to adapt to their new partner’s personality traits – Narcissists often use the mirroring technique to lure their new partners into the relationship. They may try to mimic their partner’s likes and dislikes, adapt to their traits and create an illusional relationship where the interests of both partners are shared. But such a relationship based on falseness might not last long as the narcissist’s true personality might resurface making their partner feel delusional.

The new partner’s willingness to provide narcissists with the desired narcissistic supply – All a narcissist seeks is narcissistic supply from their relationships. So as long as the new partner is able to provide admiration, validation, support, control, and complete accessibility the relationship is good to go for a good amount of time.

Ultimately for the answer to the question, “How Long Will A Narcissist Rebound Relationship Last?” – A rebound relationship is unlikely to last in long term. The average length of a relationship with a narcissist may not be more than a few years(two to three years maximum) as they easily get bored with their partners as they run out of narcissistic supply and the relationship just shifts to becoming one-sided. This is the case with some relationships.

But with a rebound relationship, the case is totally different, as the average length of a rebound relationship can be anywhere between six months or two to three years. In most cases, a relationship with a narcissist might not last more than two or three years maximum and if the relationship is a rebound relationship then the period can be even shorter than this. As infatuation, lust, or a fling may never last longer than this. The duration is usually short for rebound relationships as most of the time no real feelings are involved as these relationships are born out of an urge to seek revenge, show off, or just not be alone for the narcissist.

Even if by luck or fluke the relationship may outrun its course and might last longer than that then it can be a rare situation. Very few narcissistic relationships may last longer, as both partners equally get involved due to love or mutual liking and respect. But there are a few cases here! So do not get any high hopes.

Although the duration of a narcissistic relationship completely relies on each different individual. As every narcissist varies depending on various factors and circumstances like low self-esteem, the ways and surroundings while they were being brought up, family members that surround them, their desire to involve with other people without many selfish reasons, loneliness, and much more.

What are the stages of a rebound relationship?

A rebound relationship includes three major stages, which are common for all narcissist relationships. Narcisist’s dating cycle goes like this,

The dating cycle of Narcissists

There are 3 phases of dating a Narcissist:

1. Attraction or Idealization Phase

The Attraction or Idealization phase is the step where they spot you and grab your attraction, like spotting a target or their victims for obtaining their supply.

2. Devaluation Phase

Once they gain your complete trust, this is when they start playing with your feelings and thoughts by using their manipulative tactics. This is the phase when they would suck the positivity out of you and drain you.

3. Discard Phase or Rejection Phase

The Discard phase is nothing but the time when a narcissist uses you completely until their satisfaction like their puppet, and when they no longer need you or find someone else they just discard you like something unimportant. This is the phase when they usually start cheating on you or probably leave you for someone else and this cycle keeps on repeating like it’s a loop. In this, they degrade or devalue you like from the most important person in their life to the least important person.

They would be so into you at the beginning of the relationship that they would idolize you, then when they have your trust they would start the devaluation phase where they isolate you and make you completely involved just with them making you almost dependent and then they treat you like you were never important once their purpose is done with you. Their initial commitments and promises are so fake but seem real. But they are just for the namesake as narcissists never carry through them. They gaslight you, make you feel at fault and you might even doubt your sanity.

When a narcissist feels that you have lost interest or when you might be thinking of moving forward, they would drop breadcrumbs in the form of love-bombed sweet texts, emojis, comments, or even calls, just to lure you back in. They would have hidden, trustworthy, coy, selfish agendas behind breadcrumbing you. Ultimately when they feel they no longer need or have found someone better than you, this is when they leave you. So if the break up is abrupt, then the narcissist might immediately jump onto their rebound relationship.

Reasons, why narcissist rebound relationships, do not last longer

Lack of emotional depth

Narcissists are simply incapable of building a relationship where deep emotional connections are required and thus rebound relationships do not involve such deep connections hence they are short-lived and shallow. While narcissists may appear to be involved in the relationship, in reality, they’re not as they just use their new partners to seek validation, self-gratification, and admiration.

Fear of Commitment

Narcissists have a deep-rooted fear of committing to their partners and are very much unlikely to commit to a long-term relationship. Rebound relationships may just be a fling for a narcissist in many cases, and thus they might not last long.

Emotional Baggage

In many cases, the narcissist might carry on emotional baggage from the previous relationship, which may lead to a lack of trust, communication gaps, and insufficient involvement in the rebound relationship. The narcissist’s inability to process their emotional turmoil makes it difficult for them to build a strong, healthy, and long-lasting rebound relationship.

Their need for constant attention

Narcissists only thrive well after getting constant adoration, attention, and validation, and their need to thrive well often leads to the breakdown of the relationship. As providing constant adoration, attention, and validation may become difficult for their partners, making them feel undervalued in the relationship. This may also lead to disappointment in the narcissist and pent-up feelings of resentment.

Inability to take criticism and make compromises

Narcissists have very rigid expectations and often hesitate or just back out from the relationship just out of refusal. They cannot even take criticism when someone points out their mistakes. This becomes a real deal for the new partner as they are unable to build a healthy and balanced relationship with a narcissist, thus this may directly lead to the breakdown of the narcissist.

Can narcissists’ rebound relationships be long-term?

The answer is very obvious and it is “NO” as a lack of empathy makes it difficult for a narcissist to genuinely devote themselves to their new partner. They continuously fear real feelings, as they think they might lose their power and love can make them weak. Narcissists hate weakness as power, control, money, supply, and competency are all they love. Narcissists may not know or do not want to acknowledge the concept of love as their relationships are completely based on receiving their supply be it with multiple partners.

A relationship with a narcissist might feel equal in the initial stages, but during the later stages, it might feel like you are the only giver in the relationship as they only receive and give very less. They take you as a negligible take. You might always be acting as their support, but they would be MIA(Missing in action) while you need them. Having a relationship with a narcissist is difficult because they would disregard your presence in their life until they need you.

Dating a narcissist is very puzzling as you cannot figure at what stage you are at while dating them. You cannot put all pieces of a puzzle together while dating a narcissist as their behavior is different every time you try to approach them.

In conclusion

So if you feel that you are in a relationship with a narcissist, it is best to seek help from family, friends, or even professionals to ensure your own well-being and if you may want then you may even move on or break up with them. Remember that you deserve to be in a healthy relationship that nurtures you, and makes you feel loved and supported.

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Ella Carrillo

Hey Reader, I am Ella, an Online and Offline Therapist holding an experience of 6 years in this field.

From Relationship, Depression, and Personality Disorder to Narcissistic problems, I have helped a lot of people find their solutions. Upon gathering a number of common problems that people face, I decided to put the information on this blog so that anyone can get their answers easily.

How Long Will A Narcissist Rebound Relationship Last? (Will It Last Longer?)

What is a Rebound Relationship?

Reasons Why a narcissist might quickly need a Rebound Relationship after Breaking Up with their former partner?