What Happens When You Confront a Narcissist With The Truth? (Tips for Confronting)
What happens when you Confront a Narcissist with the truth? Is confronting a good idea while dealing with a narcissist? Usually being hostile is a narcissist’s trait, what reaction should you expect when you are being hostile instead of suffering the hostility? Does confronting really work with a narcissist? Let us know further the situation you have to face while confronting a narcissist.
Confrontation is actually healthy when you have a normal relationship with an understanding person or partner. You may think confrontation may ruin your relationship, but in reality, confrontation makes a relationship stronger, as you get to know the truth and point of view of the other person. Confrontation makes the relationship more transparent and builds trust.
But when dealing with a narcissist, confrontation is always risky and a not-so-good idea unless you may decide to leave them for good riddance. Narcissists run away from the truth and they do not like being told about reality. Narcissists are not good while dealing with truth, feelings, vulnerabilities, and confrontations.
Confrontations may arouse their wrath and they might make a scene. They would be loud and volatile about being confronted. So rather than confronting them, you may either choose to ignore or just side-track the topic or may even leave it altogether. You may need to find the right timing, right situation, and right set of words if at you decide to confront a narcissist.
Is it a good idea to confront a narcissist?
If you want to end things with a narcissist you may choose to confront their toxic behavior or any other trait that annoyed you. If you genuinely care for a narcissist then you may choose to confront them. You may also leave confronting whatever is bothering you. But if you plan to continue the relationship confrontation may not be a good idea. There are a few options you can choose after confronting a narcissist.
Confronting with a polite or understanding tone might be of some help. Twisting words to be more polite than genuine or reading the mood of the room may also help you.
When making a confrontation with a Narcissist, the most important or key aspects are the correct timing, the correct situation, and the correct pair of words. The correct Timing means when they are satisfied with you or your relationship seems to be in a good phase. The correct situation means you should not confront while a narcissist is going through a bad time like a demotion from a company position, or deporting from a job, or going through a not-so-good phase of life.
What Happens When You Confront a Narcissist With The Truth?
When you confront a narcissist, they would use some abusive vocabulary that can hurt you emotionally, leave emotional scars for a long time you and make you feel guilty for what you said.
Choosing timings and situations like festivities, confronting while announcing a piece of good news, or special occasions might not ruin the relationship as expected. As who does not like festivities? And whenever someone’s in a good mood, one can bear or take the not-so-likable topics a little leniently or lightly, especially confrontations.
Though you should always keep in mind that confronting a narcissist can always put you in a tough position. “Confronting a narcissist would be like fighting a battle of wills.” But being strong and standing up for yourself holds greater importance than simply dealing with a narcissist after a confrontation.
So do not fear them, put your points forward and prepare yourself for some unforeseen consequences. If you might be ready to confront a narcissist, that means you have spent some amount of time with them and have known them and their traits for a while now. So you might know up to some extent how would they react when you confront them.
Why would you choose to confront a narcissist? – Reasons for confronting a narcissist
When you discover that someone close to you is suffering from NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder), the first thing you think of is to tell them or confront them and heal yourself through their repentance. But is it even possible? Should you confront a narcissist about this? You would wish to get justification for all the miseries that you have suffered because of the narcissist. Vilifying a narcissist’s toxic behavior is important so that they also get a taste of their bitter deeds, is what you feel, but that sounds a little far-fetched as expecting repentance through confrontation is not a narcissist’s cup of tea.
A Narcissist seldom changes. They would have no regrets about hurting you or being the reason for your miseries, as a narcissist has no feeling of repentance or remorse. Instead, they would be all pent up and agitated about the confrontation that you just made.
Everyone deserves mental peace and happiness. So sometimes you need to act against a narcissist when you are done with their constant manipulation and try to confront them at some excellent timing. By doing so you might feel content for a while and also hope that they might change. But do they really change? Do not seek revenge for anything though just confrontation may be enough, as narcissists can stoop low and might take revenge for pissing them which can jeopardize your mental peace, health, and even happiness.
You can choose to confront for a few reasons. Let us know some of them,
Reasons for confronting a narcissist
- Confronting a narcissist may be beneficial to both, you and to them. For you, it might give a feeling of contentment that you were able to state the reasons for their toxic behavior. For them, it might be eye-opening as they might not be aware completely or hesitate to believe that they might be suffering through any mental health issue. This might be one of the ways to bring their attention to their mental health issue and present it clearly.
- You might confront them out of concern. You might genuinely be wishing that they might change or improve their toxic behavior which can be beneficial for both, them and you.
- By confronting you might be able to understand their point of view also, through the counter-arguments they might present for the confrontation.
- To show them the path to change. Out of genuine care and concern, you might really wish from the bottom of your heart that they might change if you confront them.
- To seek your revenge. sometimes you need to act against a narcissist when you are done with their constant manipulation and try to confront them at some excellent timing. By doing so you might feel content for a while and also may feel happy.
- To make them realize their mistake and hold them responsible for being such a pain in the neck.
- To regain control of your life. A Narcissist is an individual who is excessively obsessed to have control over all situations like financial situations, etc and individuals in their life. So by being with them you might even lose your self-identity and self-control.
- You almost lose your self-worth, self-love, and self-respect, and most importantly you lose yourself when being with a narcissist, so to gain self-worth, self-love, and self-respect you might confront.
- Gaining equal importance, respect, equality, and a chance to build a better relationship, you might make up your mind to confront.
- When you have a permanent relationship like married, engaged, or looking forward to spending your life with them, confronting them might be your best option.
- If you wish to build a reliable relationship together, you might consider the option of confronting.
What happens when you confront a Narcissist with the Truth?
A narcissist understands their own language in a better manner, meaning use their words against them while confronting.
What happens when you confront a Narcissist with the Truth?
There will be a few consequences when you confront a narcissist,
- You can face their wrath
- You might face their arrogance and bitterness
- You may be treated with the silent treatment
- Their counterstatement and arguments
- Most observed and expected reactions are “negation” or denial
1. You can face their wrath
The first and foremost reaction of a narcissist to any inconvenience caused by others is anger, rage, or wrath. If you have been with a narcissist you might be aware of their anger issues. They feel more agitated than usual when you ask them to reflect upon the confrontation. They would be harsh with their words. They would try to hurt you emotionally. They might even try to project the confrontation toward you. They may also state that the problem might be with you and not them. They may state that they are perfectly fine with perfect mental health. They would try to reverse the situation and play the victim.
2. You might face their arrogance and bitterness
When you confront a narcissist, they would use some abusive vocabulary that can hurt you emotionally, leave emotional scars for a long time you and make you feel guilty for what you said. They will be saying such things which you might not be willing to hear. They would call you names, would be mean, and try to make you feel regretful so that you can take back your confrontation or just feel bad for saying such things about them.
They might even blame you for everything, which is their go-to move. A narcissist cannot accept their mistake because according to them, they are never wrong. This is when they make you feel you have done something wrong but in reality, it is they who are living with their ignorance.
3. You may be treated with the silent treatment
Usually, it is you who would give them the silent treatment when they have done something wrong. But this time it is you who would be receiving the narcissist’s silent treatment upon your confrontation. Nrcisist provides the silent treatment and makes you think that you are abundantly wrong and have done something to hurt them.
In the case of confrontation, they might give you the silent treatment to run away from accepting their mistakes and wrongdoings. With the aid of silent treatment they might not have to answer your questions, no problem solving, and no explanations. They even get to get their control back because you might go nuts while thinking what has gone wrong? or what have you done to receive such treatment without a clue!
4. Their counterstatement and arguments
You should always keep in mind that confronting a narcissist can always put you in a tough position. “Confronting a narcissist would be like fighting a battle of wills.” Be ready for uncanny and unlikely counterarguments which might leave you speechless, because narcissists are really “Pro” at the word game. They are the player of words as they know the right words and the right time to use them as weapons. They might remind you of your wrongdoings with day, date, time, and place along with with your exact words. So be ready for their blame game and counterarguments.
What Happens When You Confront a Narcissist With The Truth?
When dealing with a narcissist, confrontation is always risky and a not-so-good idea unless you may decide to leave them for good riddance. Narcissists run away from the truth and they do not like being told about reality. Narcissists are not good while dealing with truth, feelings, vulnerabilities, and confrontations.
5. Most observed and expected reactions are “negation” or denial
Expect the most common reaction of a narcissist “Negation” or “Denial” to anything undesirable happening in their life. Your confrontation right is undesirable for them as they cannot accept criticism well. When dealing with a narcissist, confrontation is always risky and a bad idea. Narcissists run away from the truth and they do not like being told about reality. Narcissists are not good while dealing with truth, feelings, vulnerabilities, and confrontations.
Now that you have decided firmly to confront a narcissist, here are a few tips that can actually help and be strong-headed,
Tips for Confronting a Narcissist
The best way to get back at a narcissist is by threatening them with the fear of deserting them or leaving them. You can threaten them with false statements to abandon them. Threaten them by creating a scenario of when they would be alone without you if they deny showing some change or at least try to better. Show them the future where you are not with them.
A narcissist understands their own language in a better manner, meaning use their own words against them, or if they are providing a silent treatment you also do the same.
If they yell at you, do the same. If they project their wrath, do the same. Reciprocate their behavior to prove your seriousness about the situation and prove that you are strong-headed this time and would not back down without receiving at least some affirmative changes.
They might even try to lure you by showering excessive love. But do not be weak and give in here. Strongly put forward your deal of confrontation and demand for affirmative changes firmly.
Prepare what you have to confront them about wisely as they might use your words against you.
When making a confrontation with a Narcissist, the most important or key aspects are the correct timing, the correct situation, and the correct pair of words. The correct Timing means when they are satisfied with you or your relationship seems to be in a good phase. The correct situation means you should not confront while a narcissist is going through a bad time like a demotion from a company position, or deporting from a job, or going through a not-so-good phase of life.
Key Takeaways
Confronting a narcissist may be beneficial to both, you and to them. For you, it might give a feeling of contentment that you were able to state the reasons for their toxic behavior. For them, it might be eye-opening as they might not be aware completely or hesitate to believe that they might be suffering through any mental health issue. This might be one of the ways to bring their attention to their mental health issue and present it clearly.
Though you should always keep in mind that confronting a narcissist can always put you in a tough position. “Confronting a narcissist would be like fighting a battle of wills.” But being strong and standing up for yourself holds greater importance than simply dealing with a narcissist after a confrontation. So do not fear them, put your points forward and prepare yourself for some unforeseen consequences.
Prepare what you have to confront them about wisely as they might use your words against you.
Be ready for unforeseen situations. Confrontations may arouse their wrath and they might make a scene. They would be loud and volatile about being confronted. So rather than confronting them, you may either choose to ignore or just side-track the topic or may even leave it altogether. But if you may have to confess, then you might want to follow the tips provided in the above section of the article, to deal with this situation in a better manner.
From Relationship, Depression, and Personality Disorder to Narcissistic problems, I have helped a lot of people find their solutions. Upon gathering a number of common problems that people face, I decided to put the information on this blog so that anyone can get their answers easily.
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